I was listening to Amy Poehler’s podcast recently, the episode where she talks with Ina Garten, and I ended up taking more leadership notes than cooking notes. Ina has this grounded and generous way of talking about work and people that sneaks up on you. And Amy, local legend from Massachusetts, brings out something real in every guest she interviews.
Ina shares a simple piece of advice about what teams need from their leaders. They need you to be clear, and they need you to be happy. It sounds simple, but it opens up a bigger point about how leaders show up.
She tells a story about going through something difficult in her life and realizing that her mood followed her into work. Her team felt it immediately. Their energy shifted. The way they approached the day shifted. Nothing dramatic, just the normal ripple effect of a leader’s presence.
That reminded me of the first-time CEO who told me the most surprising part of the role was “how mindful you have to be of how your face reacts in meetings.” She learned quickly that people watch your reactions and then make decisions based on them. Leaders are constantly sending signals, whether they mean to or not.
I don’t think a leader needs to pretend to be cheerful all the time. That’s not real. But teams do take emotional cues from you, and being aware of that matters. Some leaders underestimate how closely people track their reactions, and the cost of that blind spot adds up over time.
Then there’s the clarity piece. This is the challenge I see most often with emerging leaders. They rise because they were exceptional executors. They could take direction, understand the goal, and deliver results. But when it becomes their job to provide the clarity instead of receiving it, they aren’t always prepared. They don’t always recognize that the primary output of leadership is decision making and then clearly articulating that decision and vision. That’s a skill people have to build.
Ina also brings up the old but important advice to compliment in public and criticize in private. It’s not new, but it is very easy to forget. And right now, with so many teams working on annual reviews, leaders are sitting on piles of positive feedback that no one has heard yet. If you’ve written something great about someone in a review, share it now. Bring it into your next team meeting. Make it specific, and make it real. Not everyone wants public praise, so know your people, but in my experience, most folks appreciate being seen.
She also talks about giving consistent feedback when someone is underperforming, and then, if things don’t improve, making a decision to let them go. She worried about how the team would react. But every time she explained the situation afterward, the response was almost identical. They were struggling with the person’s work. They felt the drag. They were relieved the issue had been addressed.
I’ve seen this play out so many times. Letting someone go is never easy. It shouldn’t be easy. But often it ends up being best for everyone involved. The team feels the impact of underperformance long before the leader makes the call, and while there may be a short period where they take on extra work, they usually appreciate the clarity and the standard being upheld.
All of this is surprisingly wise coming from a conversation that, on the surface, is about food, comfort, and creativity. But that’s kind of the point. The best leadership lessons usually come from people who are great at building environments where humans feel capable and supported.
Ina is wise in the kitchen, wise in marriage, and it turns out, wise in business leadership too. And Amy Poehler’s podcast is worth a listen if you haven’t tried it yet.
Calls to Action for Leaders
• Before your next meeting, pause and check your emotional temperature. Notice what you might be sending without realizing it.
• Ask yourself where your team needs clarity from you right now, and give that clarity plainly.
• Pull one piece of positive feedback from a recent review and share it with your team this week.
• If someone is struggling, give consistent feedback and communicate openly with the team if a change becomes necessary.
Leadership shows up in the most unexpected places. Sometimes in a boardroom. Sometimes on a podcast. Sometimes in a story about how an off day in the kitchen changes the energy in the room. And, if you’re paying attention, that’s where the good lessons usually are.